Waitress and Marine, Denied Tip because of her 'Gay Lifestyle'

Dana Morales, Waitress and Marine, Denied Tip because of her 'Gay Lifestyle'

Please read this Huffington post article before reading further!

Okay, perspective the first, you can say the bible was written by God but it was written down and interpretted by man, and actually, before the council of Nicea (around 180 A.D. when anyone who actually knew Christ was long dead) it was a collection of scrolls, and verbal traditions and these men who decided they should decide what should and shouldn't be in the Bible, edited said scrolls, threw out whole books and by the way, thought the earth was flat and if you sailed to far you would fall off the edge. Furthermore, the council of Nicea was a Roman council and wait? Weren't they the guys that killed him in the first place. They compile most of what is now known as the Roman Catholic bible in order to have something uniform to teach the people they conquered. The Irony is not lost on me.

Second, the Old testament, originally written in Hebrew, has been translated to Greek, Latin and back again so many times that it's original meaning is all but lost. (As is the New Testament, if you read a translation from Aramaic you'd be surprised what you find.) And the parts that most people go to to defend their bigotry against gay people, not only are subject to interpretation (One group will refer that line in Leviticus saying that it means God hates gays, another will say that line is actually about male prostitution and still another will point out that at the time Leviticus was written women were considered naturally sinful and property so it was okay to beat your wife or rape her or psychologically abuse her because she was a woman and you shouldn't treat a man that way cause they are holey. Anyone with any sense knows that's Bull Hockey. If you've ever been in a good gay/lesbian relationship, you know that rape and sex are two different things, and while some gay sex can be rather ... athletic, it is not about brutality no matter what Marcus Bachmann) but most people don't even pay attention to the laws of Leviticus until they are talking about something they don't like like homosexuality. Kind of sad, because if you listen to all of Leviticus Nancy Reagan would have been stoned to death the first time she went out in public in that red dress and even Jews eat shrimp cocktail, which is shellfish which if you eat you should be drowned for. Oh and btw, If you are a woman who gets married and your husband finds out you are not a virgin on your wedding night, he gets to kill you. (see Deuteronomy)

Perspective the third. The word homosexual wasn't even used until the late 1800s so if anyone says it's in the bible they are full of shit, and please tell them so. The term gay wasn't used until the late 1960 as well. Furthermore, although many people would say homosexuals have been around since air and you need to get over it, the kinds of relationship between two men or two women, where they live together as spouses as well as sexual partners, has not existed in history until recently. The first I personally know of on record was Oscar Wilde and his boyfriend. So what we are talking about did not exist when the Torah was first written between 600 B.C. in Babylon. and 400 B.C. in Persia. Nor did it exist in 180 A.D. in Rome. Two men did not live together and neither did two women unless they were relatives or spinsters. I'm not saying that there haven't been men who wanted this kind of relationship but on penalty of death or imprisonment they didn't dare.

Perspective the fourth. I really doubt this woman who evidently looked quite manly, came up to this couple and said "Hi I'm Daniel, I'm a lesbian." or "Hi, I'm Daniel, I'm transitioning." Her "lifestyle" was an assumption by this couple. Some people can't help but look opposite their gender. I've known women who look quite ridiculous with curly teased hair, and in pretty dresses. It doesn't make them look feminine, it makes them look like they are trying to hard. Similarly I've known skinny, pretty men who can't help look feminine. They are just pretty.

I saw on the news recently a discussion about a proposed bill that would make it illegal to discriminate based on sexual orientation in the work place. One man's argument was that it would prevent him from exercising his religious freedom. I'm curious where in the bible it says you have to know who a person is fucking before you hire them? Is it legal to not pay your landscaper after they've completed their work because you've found out they are gay? No, it isn't. So by what right do you deny this waitress her livelihood because you assume she is a lesbian?

Perspective the fifth, and this is why I believe in Jesus but don't consider myself a Christian, Jesus hung out with thieves, women of questionable virtue, and people who others thought were scums of the earth. (Remember the Good Samaritan, the Sumerian woman he met at the well, or "let he who is without sin cast the first stone.") Why do some Christians think they need to judge people and make them pay for living their lives? He didn't even like Jewish religious leaders. He got up in their faces at every turn and yet some take their holy book and still use it to persecute others. Even most Jews don't pay that close attention to it any more.

I know all Christians do not think this way. Some of you I consider friends. I call on you to be as vocal as your less than enlightened brothers and sister, and tell them you are no longer letting them talk for all Christians. Don't apologize for them after they act like ignorant pieces of feces. Speak out now before another ignorant phrase passes their lips. Let them know that you don't see how letting two men, or two women (or in some cases three in any combination) prevents you from practicing your religion. Let them know you pay a days wage for a days work, whether you agree with whom they go home to or not. Do not oppose them, instead speak out for what you believe in as well. If not you are like the Germans that did not speak out against what was being done to the Jews. First, they didn't think it mattered because it didn't effect them, and a lot of the changes Hitler made in Germany benefited many. Then, they didn't speak out when they realized what was really going on because they were too afraid. Lastly, they didn't speak out because they were ashamed they didn't speak out sooner.

Lastly, at one point the Jews came to Jesus and asked him how to defeat the Romans. He told them to love them. They didn't get it. Make sure we get it today. Love this family in spite of themselves. Just don't be silent, while you try.

I would actually love it if this woman doubled as a volunteer fire fighter and some time in the future these people owed their children's lives to her bravery. I mean probably they already do and don't know it but in the previously mentioned scenario I would laugh myself silly at their discomfort.

Gay Marriage Again

I know I've posted way too much on this subject but it continues to just blow my mind. So today I'm watching a debate of sorts on WUSA news. The anchor was talking to two reverends about gay marriage. One was for and the other against. Now not that it matters but the one against was younger and black and the one for was older and white. I just find that slightly ironic. The anchor was asking questions regarding why people were against gay marriage and the reverend against said, "just the word "marriage."" All this fuss over a word. I mean I get it from both sides really but as Dan Savage says women are no longer considered the property of men and you can't get a wife with a few goats anymore, so we've already redefined marriage. Gay people don't think it's equal rights unless it's Marriage and not a civil union, and straight conservatives see it as a religious act between one man and one woman. I get that.

The part that blew my mind was the reverend against said something about "the children" and the anchor said statistically we know that being raised by a same sex couple doesn't harm children. The reverend argued that that remains to be seen as gay marriage isn't legal, suggesting that it could still be harmful to children. This is the part that blew my mind.

I grew up in the 70s and 80s. In many states it was illegal for a black person and a white person to marry. In fact, and as I've mentioned before, the last of the laws restricting interracial marriage was repealed in 2000 in Alabama. Later in, I think it was 2007, a biracial couple went to a Alabama justice of the peace to get married and he refused to marry them because they were bi-racial. The couple sued the state and the justice and he lost his job.

So in my years I've heard peoples opinions on interracial couples and the one thing I've always heard is, "It's the children that suffer." Meaning they aren't white and aren't black and won't be accepted by either. An Aside, Although I know people who've been bullied tend to become bullies, I just find it hard to wrap my mind around prejudiced black people, even though I've met quite a few. You would just think that people who've been shown prejudice for something they didn't do, can't control, and shouldn't really even matter, like the color of their skin, would be more sensitive to all kinds of prejudices. You'd think after it happened to you, seeing it happen to others would at very least leave a bad taste in your mouth. For some it just doesn't though and I'll never get it.

So now I've strayed from the point. Prejudice people have been saying for years that interracial marriage hurts the children, and now they are doing the same with gay marriage. plus ça change, plus c'est la même chose (an epigram by Jean-Baptiste Alphonse Karr in the January 1849 issue of his journal Les Guêpes (“The Wasps”). Literally “The more it changes, the more it’s the same thing.” It's just that in our personal lives we keep repeating the same patterns, and it seems we do it socially as well.

One thing the reverend who was for gay marriage said that I really liked. He said that we've made social changes in the name of rights for other groups and now it's the gay peoples turn. Finally!

The Battle of the Birth Control

Recently I have been hearing a lot about whether or not insurance companies should be required to pay for birth control. So I thought I would way in even though I don't have a uterus. I can sum my argument up rather quickly. Insurance companies won't pay for the pill (cost of $20-$30 per month) but they will pay for Viagra (cost of $1.62-2.82 per pill.) We are fine with 90 year old men impregnating their 20 something girlfriend or wife, but not having the girlfriend or wife decide when she's ready to reproduce. So basically it's just Conservative Christian who are afraid to give women the power over their own reproductive health. Really? Are we really that backward. In a planet of 7 billion people are we really playing out the "oh no she might not have babies" card still? Oh btw did you know until recently, you could get free birth control through the state? Well most states. Probably not mine. Mine didn't even have a Planned Parenthood that would do abortions.

I had a friend who had an answer for me. I couldn't decide whether to be offended or commend him for his intelligence. Insurance companies are owned by rich white men (usually Christians), and (now here is the offensive part) how many black men do you know with 4 and 5 kids by 2 or 3 different women? How many Hispanics? How many Muslim men let their women take birth control? Basically he's saying it's a numbers game and they don't want so called minorities and other religions to out breed the white Christians. Evidently they haven't seen the beginning of Idiocracy. (Funny movie, go see it.)

Personally I wouldn't worry about it if I were them. Evidently being a teenager makes you miss that part in health class where they explain that sex leads to babies. I worked with a lot of teenagers until recently and let me tell you. Birth control was the last thing on their minds. Just off the top of my head I can think of 3 unplanned pregnancies and a bad case of herpes from said teenagers. I could probably think of more if I tried. My favorite was the herpes. 3 guys living together brought home 3 girls and shared them. Basically had their way with them and then traded, like they were Pokemon cards. Yes it was consensual, and none of them used condoms. Evidently the girls had no self respect either. Unfortunately one of the guys had herpes and didn't tell anyone until it had spread to the other 2 guys, all 3 girls, and the pregnant girlfriend of one of the guys. I'm not surprised. When you show you have no respect for yourself much less your partner, the universe tends to agree with you. Of course, the universe always tends to agree with your base beliefs about yourself, other people, the world. It's what perspective is.

BTW and just so you know I'm not anti-christian. Although I am surprised how many gay men identify as Christian on Zoosk, Scruff, Grindr, and Match. I know a lot of Christians and most are very intelligent spiritual people. Unfortunately they don't talk as much, as loud, or as publicly as Bill O'Reilly. But that is a discussion for another time.

Manti Te'o and the irrelevant discussion

Please listen to the above discussion before reading further!

I have so many issues with this discussion I had to make a complete blog post instead of just commenting on the video. First let's review. Manti Te'o recently came to national attention as a possible victim of "Catfishing." "Catfishing" is when someone pretends to be someone else and has a relationship with someone via the internet, and sometimes by phone. This can be a girl making a facebook page using an assumed name and pictures of someone else, or a guy pretending to be a girl or a girl pretending to be a guy. The list is endless in it's possibilities.

In this case Te'o claims to have had a two and half year relationship with a woman online and then she died. Turns out the girl existed but is very much alive. He claims he was Catfished, and there is some controversy whether he was a victim of a deception or this girl was pretending to be his girlfriend for some reason and then they decided she should "die" because one or both of them no longer wanted to participate in the deception. Why do we care? This 21 year old kid has made such a splash playing high school and college football that he is a first tier NFL draft pick. So whether he's a great football player is suddenly secondary to whether he participated in this deception.

So Secondly if you watch the video you'll see I commented on it. Let me expand my thoughts here. Now I get that in order for gay people to be treated like everyone else that more people in regular life and public life need to "come out" so people know we are everywhere, in every place, in every walk of life. That we are people, and sometimes we are good and sometimes we are bad, and sometimes you would agree with us and sometimes you wouldn't. Also, unlike other minorities, like Blacks or Asians, you can't always tell from outward appearance who is gay and who is straight. So it would help our cause of equality if people in the public eye, like Anderson Cooper, Andy Cohen, and Matt Bomer, were to come out. (Yes I just named 3 out celebrities as examples). A few of the last bastions were people are reluctant to come out publicly are Hollywood, the Music Industry, and professional sports. I get all this.

Now, what they don't get that you and I get, is no one gets to tell you when it's a good time for you to come out. No one should. You should never be forced, and yes you should consider your life and what's important to you. You have to feel comfortable with yourself. Many times this is a leap of faith and you just don't know how people will react and sometimes, you do. Even Dan Savage says, if you know your parents are going to cut you off when you come out, consider waiting until you can support yourself before doing so.

As I mention in my comment, in the 90s Barbara Walters interviewed Ricky Martin at the height of his fame. She was the first person to ask him directly if he was gay. He didn't answer the question. As he tells in his book "Me" every time he was interviewed or mentioned in the press, the question kept coming up. So often it sucked the life out of his one true joy, entertaining, and forced him to shy away from the public eye. He said this not blaming Barbara Walters, but to explain how hard it was for him, a South American Catholic, former Soap star and Entertainer, to deal with his sexuality.

For the 50th anniversary of Barbara Walters career in journalism, they had a panel discussion about it on the View. Someone pointed out that she was known for asking the questions others dared not to ask. They then asked if there was any question she regretted asking. She said she regretted asking Ricky Martin if he was gay because it took from him, for a brief time, his ability to experience the one thing in his life that brought him joy. So maybe the question needs not to be asked. Maybe we just need to let people come out when they are ready. Your life is not a political statement. You don't get retakes. It's all done live without wires or nets.

Secondly, what the one man said about Catholics, Mormons and the NFL. I can't say anything about the NFL but I can say, I've known quite a few Catholics and Mormons who I find quite tolerant people and do not include themselves with those who rally against gay equality. I do find it unfortunate that they are not the Catholics and Mormons in political service. Not that I haven't met the other kind. One of the most heartbreaking moments I've had was about 8 years ago. Virginia had on it's ballot not only a ban on gay marriage but a decision to get rid of common law marriages in the state so there would never be a back door. I won't go into how I feel about gay marriage cause well ... pick any of my previous posts and I'm sure you'll see how I feel. Anyway, a woman I considered a good friend came up to me on that election day and made it a point to tell me she had voted on the ban. Now, she could have just voted and not told me that, and I'll admit, being honest with me about it makes her in my eyes, not a hypocrite. It was the pride she showed me in that moment that brought tears to my eyes. If she had come up to me with some humility and told me and said something to the effect of I like you, but it's just what I believe, it would have hurt less. You can't fault people for standing up for what they believe in, it's when they attack you with it that there is a problem. Still that is about as strong of an effect as I've gotten from a Catholic. Even the Baptists, born again Christians, and Bible Church people, you can at least have an intelligent conversation with. Well, most of them.

Thirdly, since when has God connected him/her/itself to any religion? I mean seriously? When was the last time you saw an advertising campaign directly from God saying he/she/it supported Christianity or any other religion as the one true religion. Sure they all claim that to some extent, but as Marianne Williamson says "God doesn't appreciate your labels and categories, because he's beyond them."

I think it's time we started having an intelligent conversation about God. Most people think God is supposed to be something between Superman (I jumped out of a plane without a parachute, SAVE ME) and Santa Claus (Gimme) and some because he/she/it isn't like either, refuse to believe. Which is weird because there is evidence that even Neanderthal believed in some force greater than himself. Even most Quantum Physicists will tell you the universe itself is an intelligence. (One of the oldest of spiritual laws is the Law of Mentalism, which says if the universe started as an idea in the mind of God, in order for it to change and evolve it must still be in the mind of God and is therefore mental or intelligence.) So, yes people who pray for touchdowns should be laughed at, but not people who thank God for them.

So bottom line is, until we have evidence that this kid actually was part of the deception leave him alone. Even if he was we don't know why he did it and we'd just embarrass him in finding out. Maybe he is gay. Maybe he can't talk to girls. Maybe he's one of those guys that ejaculates in his pants the minute a girl touches him. Maybe he has a very small penis. Maybe he has an inhumanly large penis that scares women. Maybe he's a bedwetter. Who cares. He's good at football. Someone draft him.

This is the kind of B.S. the media comes up with and let me tell you it's just a distraction. See if you're thinking of Manti Te'o, or Lindsay Lohan, or the latest iPhone, or the fiscal cliff, you won't be holding the people in power accountable for the massive frack ups and deceptions they perpetrate on a daily basis in your name, or looking for your own solutions. They think you're dumb and you're making them right.